Survival Mode

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 Curiosity used to bug me all the time

Too tired to learn on my own

I begrudged and hang up the phone 


My tv killed my imagination

no inspiration, no motivation 

lying in bed 

living dead


It's not sloth, 'cause I tried but...

I couldn't find anything to satisfy 

I am losing my mind 

Is this just a state of mind 

if it happens all the time?


Sex is fine,

just another activity to kill time

Another enterprise in the dopamine free line

Stuck in my mind, another night that I'll just get covered in slime


An observer of my own life

An empty chest for a heavy heart 

I am numb, completely neutral

Searching for a feeling


Comfortably uncomfortable 

'cause I can run but I can't hide 

No worry, no hope

Just survival mode


I'm simply searching for a feeling 

Have I already burnt-out?

Both indifferent and hopeful

Just like a strong acid in water 

I'll dissociate.

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